The Soul Of An Angel, The Heart Of A Saint | #Poetry | #Poem | #Depression | #Loss

The Soul Of An Angel, The Heart Of A Saint

Devoutly religious, she was the Queen of her endearing empire
Though she was clearly the alpha, my grandpa didn’t mind at all
My grandfather was loyal to the end, though they argued like fire
All the time, every single day, until they would finally unwind it all

The first dear memory of her I have is the day I was baptized
Recalling it like it was yesterday, I oft-reminisce of that day
For it laid the foundation to how I would be humbly chastised
Of all moral lessons of wrong, or right, there’s only one way

Always reminding us that actions will speak louder than words
She would cook for armies while having family get togethers
Two of her gems: the spirit is more powerful than a sword
While the other insight was that family will never fret forever

It mattered not the day or night, she was always by our side
Problems, no problems, it mattered not, she always lent an ear
And she loved dancing!  Through the hallways she would glide
While cooking, or cleaning, she was always content to endear

She had the soul of an angel and the holy heart of a saint
No matter what happens in life, I’ll reminisce her wherever
In the most vibrant and boundless of memories to paint
With each of my heartbeats I will miss her forever

R.I.P. Elena

___________________________________________________________________________________

Author’s Note:

I just found out today that my last living grandparent passed away, Elena.  Needless to say, its one of my worst fears come true and it’s been an incredibly tough day.  I’m fighting really hard to keep it together.  I only have a handful of hours more to go, but I’ll get there.

Recalling my grandma reminded me of so many fond memories growing up.  I remember being baptized like it was yesterday even though I was an infant.  My whole family was there and it’s a memory I will never forget.  Of course, my grandma was there as well.  I also recall countless memories and lessons she was always attempting to impart.  These very lessons helped lay the foundation for who I am now, for which I am eternally grateful.  The bit about her cooking for an army wasn’t really in jest.  When she cooked, she cooked for A LOT of people, even if there wasn’t that many.  She was always giving me 2 or 3 dinner plates trying to get me to grow taller lol.  Hey, maybe it worked since I hit six feet one inches when I was twelve and have been stuck there ever since.  A wide assortment of food was always a staple of our family gatherings.  There was usually a lot of us given that family get togethers easily had half a dozen to a dozen people on Sundays rather regularly.  During holidays, or birthdays, then there was easily 2 or 3 times more than that.  That was when she was in her zone cooking.  Unlike my grandpa, my grandma loved to dance a lot.  She joked about it with me when I was much younger knowing that I was terrified of dancing, and she always was trying to get me to dance but I never would.  It wasn’t until much later on that I got over my fear of not being able to dance, which was one of my three worst fears growing up.  Why is dancing so significant?  Because I grew up in a culture where dancing is a staple to life, it didn’t matter the time or the place.  And I was always afraid of being the person that wouldn’t be able to dance at family gathers or whenever, so I just kept to myself which was why I grew up incredibly reserved in that sense.  My grandma understood that and wasn’t pushy about it at all.  She was merely her vibrant, cheery self.  In fact, I don’t recall her being sad almost ever.  Not implying she didn’t experience sadness, not at all, just that her being happy was just in her nature and that just rubbed off on everyone.  That’s probably what I’ll miss about her the most.

I wanted to make the poem longer, at least twice as long, but I just don’t have the spirit in me to write more than this.  This is the best I can do under the circumstances now given my mind’s a total tornado of absolute nonsense.  I don’t even want to think right now.  Thank goodness I don’t really drink nigh ever or I would go have a couple of drinks right now.  Plus that would just wreck my health.

Anyhow, In the last few years I’ve lost three grandparents and a few friends, and it’s always incredibly painful.  I really didn’t see this coming at all.  Who can?

That’s why I’m always trying to share things in this blog that hearken to living life mindfully and in the moment, every second, every breath.  Before you know it, things change, and they change incredibly fast.  That’s why no second, nor circumstance should be overlooked because we’re just selling ourselves short.  That’s just my opinion though.

I hope the day finds you all much better and you all are doing well.

Published by

Noctis Blackburn

Open-Minded Skeptic, Book Reviewer, Introvert, Researcher, Writer, Creativity Connoisseur, Yoga Dilettante & Carmel Macchiato Addict.

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