Love – Breakaway Consciousness

#Quote Of The Night | #Darkness | #Light | #Love | #Hate | #Emotions

“Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.”
– Martin Luther King Jr.

Emotional Bank Accounts: Dividends | #Friendship | #Friends | #Love | #PositiveVibes | #Positivity

“Good friends are like walls, sometimes you lean on them and sometimes it’s good just knowing they’re there.”

BreakawayIndividual.com
Zy Marquiez
April 19, 2019

While I’m still here at the place that my friend showed me earlier today, it occurred me to write this right after my friend just left to work. Him and I discussed various things at length, but the main issue we talked about was his current divorce that he’s undergoing.

I bring this up because, 6 months ago, we wouldn’t have had this conversation. Our relationship hadn’t developed into what it is now, so its significant to have him be able to trust me enough to vent about something that’s bothering him considerably and is very important.

The reason I title this post, ‘Dividends’, though it could certainly go under the notion of ‘Interest Rates’ as far as emotional bank accounts go, is because such are the returns from making consistent deposits into emotional bank accounts.

What he is going through kind of caught me by surprise, as did him, but the point is that he hasn’t vented about this issue to nigh anyone. It always makes me wonder how important it is to vent, or even merely to talk about certain issues with people, and how that translates to how an individual feels at their inner core.

Where this goes, he knows not, but being able to help someone open the proverbial release valve in order to release some steam, irrespective of topic, is always a great thing. It’s certainly one of the best dividends that friendships entail.

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Suggested Reading:

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About The Author:

Zy Marquiez is an avid book reviewer, inquirer, an open-minded skeptic, yogi, and freelance writer who aims at empowering individuals while also studying and regularly mirroring subjects like Consciousness, Education, Creativity, The Individual, Ancient History & Ancient Civilizations, Forbidden Archaeology, Big Pharma, Alternative Health, Space, Geoengineering, Social Engineering, Propaganda, and much more.

#Book Review: Summerhill School – A New View Of Childhood by A.S. Neil | #SmartReads | #Education

BreakawayIndividual.com
Zy Marquiez
April 19, 2019

Having read three books by the late John Taylor Gatto, who has spoken out at length about the inherent issues within public schooling, while also having met some people through discussing these books, someone was kind enough to recommend this particular book. To say the least, this book is outside of the box as outside of the box can be when it comes to education.

Summerhill School – A New View Of Childhood by A.S. Neil is a book that details the venture of those who took part in the school known as Summerhill, which sought to achieve a new standard of learning and growth.

A.S. Neil was the person mainly responsible for this audacious undertaking, and his actions echo still to this day.

What Neil sought to do was create a place where the idea/value of Freedom is wholly respected, through and through. For this, this new school required a different way of thinking – a whole new mindset. This venture required the removal of preconceived notions of childhood schooling, coupled with the open-mindedness that to achieve true education in the school system the child must govern entirely free to govern themselves. This means that the child would be active in most of what the child chooses for their own development, which may include various aspects learning or playing. A true unorthodox point of view if there ever were one.

Neil’s democratic style education based around the individual is quite evocative, because when carried out correctly [as myriad examples show in his book] it shows that children can self-govern themselves, and also do so quite well. This takes place also with little to no interference from the adults, except in some very unique circumstances. For the most part though, children were left to their own devices, to choose what type of learning they would undertake.

To gauge what Neil strove to achieve, let’s take a gander at his own words:

“The goal was to use childhood and adolescence to create emotional wholeness and personal strength. Neil thought that once this wholeness had been achieved children would be self-motivated to learn what they needed academically. The key to this growth was to give children freedom to play for as long as they felt the need in an atmosphere of approval and love. The children were given freedom but not license; they could do as they pleased as long as it didn’t bother anyone else.”[1][Bold Emphasis Added]

Therein lies the beauty, for the child who ends up not playing, ends up not using one of the most important parts of life for learning and growth – imagination. Furthermore, the children that have unfinished childhoods so to speak, later in life seek to do things that could have already taken place, and which end up slowing down the progress of growth as an adult. That’s what Neil noticed in his work.

Couple to the above the fact that in the notable magazine, Scientific American, in an article titled “The Serious Need For Play”, it was reported by Melinda Wenner Moyer that one-third of the kids who had gone to play-free schools had been arrested for felonies.[2]

Additionally, there are other topics discussed within the book. Everything from social structure, emotional problems, particularly with children who are a bit older, meetings, self-government, what are called ‘problem children’, play and self-regulation and much more is discussed at length.

Perhaps, the best way to understand what Summerhill is truly about comes from the following:

“You don’t have Summerhill in order that children should study or learn to become “ists” of any kind. You let them function in their own play-work fashion, and you postulate no purpose for them at all.”[3]

The genius of the idea is that because their core individual foundation in childhood was so enjoyable and emotionally robust children end up learning vastly quicker when they choose to follow their path than students enter the public school system.

However, if that growth is not allowed when children are forced through compulsory schooling, that then crushes their individuality and imagination. Those very circumstances turn children into robots, only capable of following orders and never taught to critically think. Only memorization of facts becomes important, and not arriving at the facts through a strong critical-thinking process within their mental faculties.

For that reason, many of the topics of the book do delve into the idea of playing. Neil does make it a point about focusing on the benefits of playing quite a bit. What the notion of play entails is:

“…not thinking in terms of athletic fields and organized games; I am thinking of play in terms of fantasy. Organized games involve skill, competition, teamwork; but children’s play usually requires no skill, little competition, and hardly any teamwork.”[4][Bold Emphasis Added]

In other words, true play, like a whetstone, hones the development of imagination. And imagination is integral, because a child whose imagination hasn’t developed has had his childhood stultified, as well as their imagination, and will be a conformist child, and thus, a conformist adult at the drop of a hat. Disturbingly, this is exactly what we see in society more and more with time.

The book is split up into two parts. First, the book covers all facets regarding Summerhill, which are covered at length from a variety of angles, citing dozens and dozens of examples of how children responded to particular scenarios and whatnot. Everything from classes, theater, music, sex, teachers, and much more is discussed here. The second part of the book covers many aspects of Neils life, as he takes us through the journey of what brought him to taking part in Summerhill.

All this considered, the book is a fantastic read. Admittedly, the first half appealed to me a lot more than the second part, but that’s because the interest for me was in the process for the individual and not so much in how the author came to be part of it. Regardless, the book really is something worth pondering for anybody that thinks the one-size-fits-all public schooling and compulsory conformity system that western schooling has become is good, really needs to take a look at the conformity crisis that’s taking place. That, however, is a whole different can of worms. One that John Taylor Gatto discusses at length in all of his books.

If you have read any of John Taylor Gatto’s book, then you will know how indoctrination and conformity are the aim of public schooling, and there’s many public documents showing this. Because of that, and more, an honest view into a different paradigm such as this one brought about by Neil is needed. Summerhill has shown that education and personal growth can actually be enjoyable for once.

Summerhill has already broken new ground for a new paradigm. Now it’s up to individuals to ruminate upon how to learn from it and see where it may take them.

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Footnotes:

[1] A.S. Neil, Summerhill School – A New View Of Childhood, p. xviii
[2] Moyer, Melinda Wenner, “The Serious Need For Play.” Scientific American, 2013: 86. Print.
[3] A.S. Neil, Summerhill School – A New View Of Childhood, p. 217.
[4] Ibid., p. 32.

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Suggested Reading & Watching:

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Suggested Reading & Watching:

What Is The Difference Between Education & Public Schooling?
Logical Fallacies Employed In Every Day Life
Dumbing Us Down by John Taylor Gatto
Weapons Of Mass Instruction by John Taylor Gatto
13 Great Reasons To Study Logic
How A Generation Lost Its Culture – by Professor Patrick Deneen
A Different Kind Of Teacher by John Taylor Gatto
Socratic Logic by Peter Kreeft Ph.D.
Philosophy 101 by Peter Kreeft Ph.D.
Brave New World & Brave New World Revisited by Aldous Huxley
What Is Education? The Elite Curriculum – John Taylor Gatto
Breakaway Guide To Censorship, Disinformation, Logical Fallacies & More
How To Read A Book by Mortimer J. Adler and Charles Van Doren
Classrooms Of The Heart [Documentary] – John Taylor Gatto
Sumerhill School – A New View On Childhood by A.S. Neil
Social Engineering 101
The True Purpose Of Modern Schooling
Getting Things Done by David Allen
Open-Source Method: Genius Education – Examples | John Taylor Gatto
The Trivium – The Liberal Arts Of Logic, Grammar & Rhetoric by Sister Miriam Joseph Ph.D.
Cultural Literacy – What Every American Needs To Know by E.D. Hirsch Jr.
A Rulebook For Arguments by Anthony Weston
A Workbook For Arguments by David R. Morrow & Anthony Wesson
Drilling Through The Core – Why Common Core Is Bad For American Education by Sandra Stotsky & Contributors

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#Quote Of The Day | #Light | #Darkness | #Love | #Poetry | #Poem | #Prose

“Light is easy to love, show me your darkness.”
R. Queen

Emotional Bank Accounts: Anonymous Donations | #Kindness | #Positivity | #PositiveVibes

“Kindness is a gift everyone can afford to give.”
– Unknown

“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”
– Mark Twain

Kindness

BreakwayIndividual.com
Zy Marquiez
April 14, 2019

The human element is an intriguing thing. You will have people that know you for a very long time that take you for granted, and there’s people you know for minutes and start doing the most random and amazing things for you. These circumstances that revolve around people you don’t know is what we’ll call an anonymous donation.

Through a confluence of circumstances in person as well as online two days ago I had a few people randomly send me messages or drop comments when I least expected; I was appreciative of this act of kindness and let them know. I don’t know any of these folks at this moment, and that’s the point, they are anonymous in the true sense of the word.

Sometimes the most minute of gestures is all one needs to go from merely beginning to sink (mentally, emotionally, psychological, et al) to having an act of kindness act as a buoy to keeps you floating among the tides.

One thing is someone you know doing something nice for you, and that you can totally understand. In fact, days ago my friend was having a really bad day due to a divorce and so on, and our other friend that’s like a sister wrote a note for him that was very thoughtful. When you’re going through incredibly tough times like my friend is, kindness goes a very long way, and oft-times it doesn’t take a lot of effort.

Having someone you know do something for you, anything, is incredibly in my opinion. It should be appreciated every time and twice on Sundays.

But when people you don’t know do something random for you? That’s one of those things that life is all about.

Kindness knows no bounds.

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Suggested Reading:

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Emotional Bank Accounts: Large Scale Withdraws | #Friends | #Friendship | #Love | #Life | #Trust | #Loyalty

BreakawayIndividual.com
Zy Marquiez
April 12, 2019

There are significant reasons why I keep hammering away on this blog on why acts of kindness and goodness can be seen as deposits, because sometimes they help when a ‘withdraw’ must be made during a relationship.

Deposits into emotional bank accounts are incredible for various reasons. These (1) move the quality of life of an individual across the positive spectrum, they (2) help relationships grow and flourish, they (3) strengthen the relationships in myriad ways, but they (4) can also make a crucial difference in someone’s life during key turning points.

The above reasons are why I always tell people I appreciate them when I feel it’s right, no matter how many times I’ve told the person and no matter whether I know them or not. All acts of kindness move every type of relationship across the positive spectrum of growth and anything that can make relationships grow is a great thing.

Plus, who doesn’t like to know they are appreciated? It’s a small act of goodness that goes a long way.

However, sometimes, for whatever reason, it doesn’t matter how many times you tell a friend of yours they can count on you, they might think that you’re ‘too busy’ or ‘not concerned’ or find any other of a plethora of reasons.

Where am I going with this? Follow along for a minute.

Say you – the reader – and I are friends. We’ve been friends for quite a few years so there’s that bit of history that friends undergo, a bit of a positive emotional bank account built up. Heck, let’s move this scenario up a notch, say we’re great friends. Not merely acquaintances, not good friends, but great friends. Not the best of friends, but surely not merely a run-of-the-mill friendship that can happen in modern day life with how loose the term friend can be bandied about with the advent of social media the last two decades or so.

Now, as a friend, you let me know often, definitely several times a week, “Hey if you ever need anything, it’s all good, no question asked, I got your back.” Etc. Etc. It’s not unreasonable to think that I should be able to count on you, right? Okay, that much should be obvious.

One day when you decide to text one morning and ask if all is well, I say, “Yeah everything’s fine.”[1] Hours later, I call you and I say, “Yeah, so, I sort of slipped and fell, and hit my head on the counter, and passed out for almost an hour. There was blood on the counter, but everything’s okay. I just went back to bed. No big deal.”

No. Big. Deal. NO. BIG. DEAL. NO BIG DEAL?!?!?

I don’t know about how any of you would react, and please leave your opinions below because maybe I am overacting here but slipping and hitting your head is a big deal. Passing out instantly? INCREDIBLY BIG DEAL. Making it seem like its no big deal? EVEN AN BIGGER DEAL!

Actually, I am incredibly oversimplifying here; this problem is VASTLY more complicated than what I am writing about here for this type of circumstance and history goes back years. I am simplifying to try and not be too verbose and get to the point.

The point: this is the type of circumstance that almost requires a (possible) large withdraw from an emotional bank account. What exactly do I mean by this? I mean telling something to someone they don’t want to hear. I also say ‘possible’ in parenthesis because, some people will instantly be offended that you call them out on a mistake, causing a withdraw. Others will in fact appreciate it because it shows you care about them, causing the act to be a deposit.

Now before we go on, there’s a distinction in the type of ‘withdraws’ people can make. There’s the withdraws where people make a mistake (someone purchased the wrong item; someone didn’t help you out when they said they would over and over again; someone forgot your birthday; etc.) which leads to a ‘withdraw’ given the circumstances. Conversely, there’s times where the withdraw is not caused by an individual having made the mistake, but by them being called out on it, whether that mistake is any of the above examples in parenthesis or others [2]. Who sees a given circumstance as a withdraw is incredibly subjective, but the above examples and their ramifications are always a distinct possibility in all relationships. Whether the circumstances lead to a ‘withdraw or not’ it does or not is a different story. Of course, these circumstances could be wider in scope, but let’s keep it simple.

Knowing all the above, how would each of you react as an individual? I am uncertain as to how anyone would react to the above scenario, but it should be reasonable to see how a caring human being would at least be concerned (at the minimum) and/or possibly furious (in the worst case), and that’s totally understandable. Heck, it wouldn’t be unreasonable to be concerned for a stranger that you saw slip and fall down on the street, would it? Why would it be any different with a friend?

There’s a real possibility that person could have not woken up, especially given the blood loss that could have also kept going during sleep if that issue hadn’t been handled properly. Even without the blood loss, REAL, BIG, DEAL.

Not going to sugar coat this, when this happened this person was told out right that they screwed up, and screwed up big. And really, I don’t even care if a person reacts with a view in which the entire bank account being ‘emptied’ or even go into the negative. It doesn’t bother me one bit. What does bother me is how someone – anyone – could make a small deal about such a circumstance. It is akin to your car shutting down in the drive way (no big deal) and your car shutting down right when you’re crossing train tracks with an incoming freight train torpedoing full steam ahead (BIG FLIPPIN’ DEAL).

The key takeaway is that while one could argue about which type of scenario might ‘require’ a withdraw or not, I’m not sure if there’s any bigger scenario then when someone’s life could possibly on the line, whether that is by concussion, blood loss, or any other issue.

If that’s not worth all the deposits you will ever make into an emotional bank account, I’m not sure what is.

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[1] The word ‘fine’ is one of those words that is a clue that acts like smoke. Sometimes it can merely be nothing. But most of the time, it’s a spark that’s dropping in slow motion into an ocean of gasoline.

[2] If this seems confusing, to simply: some individuals will make the same mistake dozens of times over the year, and they see nothing wrong with it because that’s their mindset for whatever reason. So to them, them making ‘withdraws’ is not seen as a traditional withdraw because that kind of thing doesn’t bother them. Now, if you do point out those mistakes, and call them mistakes, then that would qualify as a ‘withdraw’ because they choose to get mad at that. Sometimes the action is the withdraw, sometimes the reaction is the withdraw, and sometimes both action and reaction cause withdraws; it totally depends on an individual and the circumstances.

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Suggested Reading:

Emotional Bank Accounts: Gold & Silver Vs. Cash | #Friendship | #Friendship #Kindness | #Love | #QualityOfConsciosuness | #PositiveVibes #Positivity

BreakawayIndividual.com
Zy Marquiez
April 11, 2019

Deposits and withdraws within emotional bank accounts have varying degrees.

Just as there’s a difference between the precious metals gold and silver when compared to cash (federal reserve notes), there’s a significant difference between normal every-day acts of kindness and more significant ones.

Gold and Silver are tangible assets. Cash is merely federal reserve notes. The main difference is that the former asset is tangible, while the latter is merely the facsimile of it. In the same way that gold and silver vis a vis cash are on separate levels, some normal every-day acts individuals undertake for people juxtaposed with more significant acts are on separate tiers.

For instance, saying hello to someone, smiling, opening a door for someone, doing a small favor, are all actions that contribute positively to an individual’s emotional bank account. However, these acts are not the same as someone changing your tire, helping you move, someone baling you out of trouble, doing a big favor, lending an ear in a time of need, etc. It’s clear these examples rank differently across the spectrum [1]. How noteworthy an action is, along with how much a person appreciates the act dictate how significant that act is as an emotional deposit.

The point is that relationships build upon trust, actions, time, history and other factors, and those factors outline the parameters of why we hold certain friends in higher standards than others. That’s why one could argue there’s a difference between people being friends, good friends, great friends and best friends. Another argument could be made that, as one goes up in tiers, one ‘kind of’ expects (I say this loosely) each higher tier to do more than the lower, IF it all possible [2].

For instance, would you expect a total stranger to do you a small favor? Maybe, maybe not. But would you expect a friend to do so? Probably most of the time. Equally, would you expect a random friend or acquaintance to drop everything if something significant happened like a family member was in the hospital? Maybe. But would you expect one of your best friends to do so if you asked? More than likely.

In no way am I saying that anybody needs to do anything, simply that there’s a certain expectancy in friendship based on the circumstances and issues we individuals face. It’s simply people having your ‘back’ so to speak.

Each type of emotional deposit, each type action, builds trust and loyalty. These factors build relationships, and further solidify what they ultimate become among the above discussed tiers of friendship.

While that might not seem like a big deal, it is incredibly paramount, for society runs on arguably trust more than anything.

You trust your deposits to be safe in your bank, you trust your food to be safe, you trust your children to be safe in school, you trust media is telling you the truth, and so on. Every single one of us has a level of trust that is inherent in nigh every interaction we undertake, and yet, paradoxically, trust is nigh never discussed in every day topics. Ruminate upon that deeply for it has a bearing on how society operates.

As trust between individuals grows, a healthy relationship follows, relationships of myriad types. And the level of trust between each of these relationships dictates what you expect and what you do not. That said, everyone is different, and that’s one of the spices of life, variety.

No matter what type of outlook or expectancy an individual has on friendships, there is a significant difference between one act and another, whatever those acts may be.

And just like there are rocks, crystals, gems, diamonds and black pearls in nature, there are individuals that mirror each of those, and with good reason, because that difference matters. If it didn’t, there wouldn’t be a distinction between strangers and family, between friends and best friends.

That distinction is what life is about: quality human beings [3].

For quality human beings were, are, and always will be a cut above the rest.

No amount of cash, gold, or silver in the world can top that.

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[1] An individual’s spectrum under which actions ping on an emotional bank account varies, and sometimes considerably. My hopes in the above example was simply to note that, even though each individual values different actions differently, there is a point where some actions are of smaller significance when compared to others.

[2] I say ‘kind of’ because what people expect from friendships vary given an individual’s point of view, culture, society, philosophy, spirituality, age, sex, life experience and so on.

[3] Quality human being doesn’t imply perfection of any individual, far from it. It just means the assemblage of acts an individual undertakes over the course of a lifetime that ultimately end up echoing who you are over the long term.

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